Blonde.

“A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. ‘Oh, I really liked it,’ she replied, ‘especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.’ Dumbfounded, her date asked, ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello? It’s only 25 cents!’”

 

While scouring the internet for the best blonde jokes, the one above, from laughfactory.com, made me laugh so hard, I had to throw down my plastic, Poland Springs water bottle and stop drinking- in order to prevent myself from choking on my laughter.

 

That one was the best I’ve heard in a while. I am blonde, so I get those jokes quite frequently. Some of them are funny as hell, while other ones are so bad- I cringe.

 

While the infamous dumb blonde stereotype occasionally gets under my skin, I think that the perks to having light, golden locks overrule the negatives. Yes, some blondes are stupid, but so are some brunettes!

 

I was born blonde, blonde, blonde; however, in about fifth grade, my hair began to turn a nasty, mousy shade of brown. It was so bad that one day, when I was in seventh grade, my mom told me, “Sam, get in the car, you need to fix your hair.” She took me to her hairdresser, and I came out with beautiful blonde highlights. Ever since then, I have gone to the salon, and I have gotten more and more blonde and have been that way ever since. I love being blonde, despite the stereotypes.

 

The best thing you can do, as a blonde, is to use the stereotype to your advantage. I’m pretty smart, and I can not even tell you the amount of times I have manipulated people who have doubted my intelligence. (That goes to show how smart they are!) I have found that it is extremely easy to exceed low expectations.

 

In addition to being thought of as dumb, when you’re blonde, another common stereotype is that you have more fun due to your promiscuity. In reality, being blonde is just a further sign of femininity; it makes us “ultra-girly.”  In truth, us blondes probably do have more fun because we are making fun of everybody who doubts and underestimates us. Joke is on them!!

 

Light-haired ladies- listen up: Emmett Richmond, in the movie Legally Blonde, says, “You know, being a blonde is actually a pretty powerful thing. You hold more cards than you think you do.”  That is an entirely true statement. Ultimately, be happy with who you are. You possess far more power than you think.